No Silence Today
Tue, 24/11/2009 - 11:47 — Abu Sayed
Today Silence has broken all its tradition,
Today Silence has been bothered –
Silence, today, has been an enemy.
Injustice has been biting too sharp,
Cruelty has stepped too further –
Inhumanity has crowned the unjust
Today silence is bitter.
Speak my soul
Speak my heart –
Speak speak my lips my tongue;
‘cause humanity is lost
Peace is gone wane.
The cruel claws of the demon
Has wrapped every facet of heart,
The good will of all.
Today silence is not saintly,
Today silence is a crime.
Comments
a pome that builds
feels that with some editing and rewriting it could be a poem that builds to a crescendo in the last two lines- silence is not saintly / today silence is a crime.
silent witness...
Clare R
I like the repetition of what silence is, and is not:
Lines I find especially strong are:
Today Silence has broken all its tradition
Today silence is bitter.
Speak speak my lips my tongue;
Today silence is not saintly,
Today silence is a crime.
I thought the contrast in the middle with speaking, as opposed to silence was interesting - it reminded me of the structure of the poem, with speaking (text) and silence (blank space) and how one shapes and defines the other.
I noticed that silence had human qualities; 'not saintly', 'an enemy' but also abstact qualities; 'is a crime'. Is this intentional? What's the thinking behind this?
A very interesting poem; I'd like to see more!
Speech Speech
Hi Abu,
have read this a couple of times and it seems like a speech to me - i can visualise the scene of a 'onto the ramparts' type movie moment (that's how it first get me anyhow)
i would suggest dumping uneccesary Capital letter usage at the begining of each line unless it is after a full stop or some other such
steve x
agree
and I am allergic to repetition anyway (prob just a personal thing so just ignore if want )
Thanks dear Steve! It's one
Thanks dear Steve!
It's one of the very honest and sincere comments I've ever received.
I hope you'll continue to suggest in future.